Unsolicited Learnings From 2022
Back on my EOY sh*t
As promised, it’s been a while.
It’s the end of the year, so, of course, I’ve been reflecting. And planning.
2022, and I’d like everyone to know I typed 2021 first, is a year I don’t have many superlatives for—at least not at the moment. It was hard at times, but not the hardest. Joyful and adventurous, but tempered with simplicity and quiet. It started with exhaustion, but was softened by rest. At times it felt like so much was happening, but, come to think of it, not that much.
I moved out of beloved Lawrence, Kansas, landing, perhaps a bit unexpectedly, in St. Louis, my hometown. I can say that I am both a little bit more confident and more humble ending this year. I have a better understanding of my blindspots. I felt deeply loved and cared for. I dropped into the splits at every wedding I attended.
It was a year full of learning which came to me by way of confronting some fears, new experiences, shortcoming, and shaking the advice out of people who weren’t trying to give it. Never without a list, I’ve been chronicling the big and the small of 2022. Coming to you live from my notes app, here are the ones that felt worth sharing:
How you communicate is everything.
Across every area of life this has proven true. So I want to be thoughtful, kind, and direct when necessary, of course, but also have fun and not overthink every interaction. How we communicate is also how we share who we are with others.
Question the narrative.
Especially the ones we make up about ourselves.If it’s going to make your life more organized, just buy it.
(BAGGU packing pouches, so many baskets from Target, iCloud storage)
Setting up good systems is a superpower.
I’ve read enough nerdy self-help books on habits and goal setting in the last year to write a whole letter on it (I almost did). After fighting the “work smarter, not harder” quip for years, I’ve come to embrace the wisdom it aims to offer. Front-loading some work to get super organized and have clear systems for things like finance, exercise, content consumption, and goals has been a game changer and has freed up a lot of mental space. As James Clear said in Atomic Habits, "you do not rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems."
There is freedom and joy in giving yourself permission to not have to be things that don’t serve you and your goals.
Rest allows the nervous system to reset.
I’m thankful for generous time off from work this year that made all the difference in recovering from the exhaustion and anxiety from the last several years that hit at the end of 2021.
Walking is meditative and 100% counts as exercise.
Octopus is delicious. Oysters are not.
Tried some new seafood this year. That’s my take.
Sometimes you’re not going to be able to thrift the thing you’re looking for.
Sports are fun!
Initially a 2021 key learning, but one that has continued into the year. The biggest fomo I’ve felt this side of adulthood was being stranded driving across New Mexico while KU played in (and won) the final four. I also became a soccer fan this year, initially to mess with someone, but decided the sport is fun. Go Spurs!If you release an album, I will listen.
As told by my Spotify wrapped.
“I hope you have the best day available to you.”
This one is from my friend Kendra who would sometimes sign off her video messages this way. What a wonderful and gracious wish for ourselves and others.
Be generous with the attention you give others.
For a while this year I was trying to read Elizabeth Alexander’s poem Ars Poetica #100: I Believe every morning. The last line reads “and are we not of interest to each other?” Haunting in the best, most necessary way.
Verbalize gratitude.
Even if it feels awkward, say “you’re welcome.”
And a few goals and hopes for 2023:
Relearning Spanish
I’ve been wanting to regain a conversational level in Spanish for a while but have felt daunted by trying to add more structured screen time or zoom calls to my life. So, I’m going to listen to podcasts and watch shows in Spanish, looking up words and grammar as I need to, but I’ll mainly focus on conversations with other people who are also wanting to practice Spanish or conversations with some of the existing Spanish speakers in my life who have generously offered to chat with me.Writing something here every quarter.
Four feels sustainable for me. This year I want to focus on trusting my voice and intuition when writing. I should brush up on grammar too.Continue to move and exercise regularly through dance, yoga, walking, and building strength.
A few big plans for travel I’m dreaming up!
Continue to connect to people and place.
The biggest thank you to everyone who was a someone in my life this year. Catch you on the next mile. We are ready enough for whatever comes next!
<3 Elizabeth
P.S. If you want to do some serious reflection and vision setting for the change of year, I learned about Year Compass from Candice Brathwaite sharing it on TikTok. It’s a free download and something I think I will do every year.